Weak and Powerless
by MiyuTanemura
Summary: In a world where bonds exist, Natsu's not reacting well to either his bond or his bond-partner. Unfortunately this might have dire consequences. Natsu/Gray


Disclaimer: I don't own anything, of course.

Note: Unbetaed so, my apologies for the mistakes or things that are off.

* * *

**Weak and Powerless**

"Happy? What are you doing here so early?"

The blue cat's ears perked in the direction of the voice and Happy saw Lucy, she was smiling at him despite the slight air of tiredness coming from her. She sat at the table where the cat was sat upon.

"Good morning, Lucy." Happy returned the greeting before silencing himself. "You're up early too. I didn't expect to see you this early…"

"I'm supposed to meet with Mirajane, she invited me to go do some shopping, she said that in a village close by there are the most exquisite… wait…" The blonde leaned forward on the table, eyes narrowing. "You're trying to distract me. What's happening? Why didn't you answer my first question; what are you doing here this early?"

The cat's whiskers twitched, the inner agitation surfacing.

"We're here this early because Natsu couldn't stand being at home any more. He was restless and his humor terrible."

* * *

The blonde nodded slowly.

"Ah. I see. But when he got here at the guild he calmed some, didn't he?" she got up slowly and looked around, trying to find her dragon-slayer friend.

With a sigh Happy acquiesced. "Yes, he got a little bit better but... he was still jittery, didn't seem to be able to sit still."

"Right. Well, given his condition, the news and the incident…" Lucy rested her elbow on the table and placed her chin in her hand. "From what I heard, he needs to accept it and work to improve the connection."

"How so?" Happy stood up and looked at Lucy, eyes brimming with anxiety.

Pressing her lips into a thin line Lucy paused. She was now sitting straight, hands stretched on the slightly grainy surface of the table, her attention on the cat.

"There are some… how can I… well, you've noticed that there are different kinds of mages, right? There are some types and there are some times when things connect." She made a vague gesture with her hand. "These connections are and, yet, aren't rare. There are many people who have an extra ability – for instance, I can connect with my spirits but I don't have the ability to do so with another mage." She gave a slight nod and looked up towards the ceiling, giving a soft exhale. "Natsu can but his connection is with someone whose abilities would usually make it impossible for such a thing to happen…" the blonde faltered. "It's not common to have a 'slayer and a 'maker connecting. Those groups have a huge antagonism. So, Natsu's like that because that was a big change for him. You felt it already right?"

Happy nodded slowly. "I don't understand why but I could almost _feel_ the dragon. Just… nobody had explained things to me like that."

The celestial mage smiled. "It was my pleasure. I know that I didn't explain everything clearly but I don't know much either… I just hope that Natsu controls his temper and calms himself down a bit." She smothered a chuckle.

"I just hope things get back to normal soon…" the blue cat said, sadly.

That earned him a headshake from the blonde. She extended her hand and held one of the cat's paws.

"I don't think that's going to be possible-" she was about to continue when a sudden crash made her look up.

As expected, there was Natsu. He was… like she knew he would, brimming with a fierce energy, hanger oozing from him and just on the brink of snapping – his control was visibly slipping from him and Lucy did _not_ want to be anywhere near when it finally disappeared. She looked around, trying to locate Mira, feeling the urge to go away, as fast as she could, coming from deep down, her baser instincts.

Natsu had, in the meanwhile, started heading towards their table. He plopped heavily onto the chair and gave Lucy a grunt, so as to greet her.

The celestial mage was taken slightly aback, not finding a reply. Her muscles locked and anxiety at what might happen next filled her. Of one thing she was sure – this wasn't her friend, the one who acted so childishly and so carefree at times. And he wasn't the same from the last time she had seen him. Now the aura surrounding him was much stronger, nearly suffocating and, from her gut feeling, darker. She cleared her throat.

"So, hm, Natsu. How are the _things_ going?"

The fire mage threw a heated glare at her.

'That well, huh?' she thought, gulping. "Look… I know that I've never gone through what you're, well, going through but you mustn't fight the bond. It's going to be worse for you in the long run."

"Don't you think _I_ know that?" he nearly spat. "But I just can't accept it, especially not with _that_ person."

"But Natsu," Lucy almost pleaded, scooting closer, "it's not like Gray is your enemy. You know that already and we-"

"He might as well be." Natsu growled menacingly.

At that moment, almost as if he had been summoned, Gray entered the guild. His eyes zeroed in on Natsu, almost as if they had been attracted to the fire mage; like metal is attracted to a magnet. Lucy saw Natsu freeze and then turn to Gray, his right fist closing tightly and a strange red layer of light spread out to envelope him.

Lucy noticed Gray's smirk and the way he sauntered towards them. This wasn't going to go well so she did the first thing she thought about, grab Happy and flee.

* * *

A red haze had taken over Natsu.

He could feel his whole self converging to Gray. He heard the steady steps coming closer, the rustle of the fabric, the even breathing and the slowly speeding heart. Heck! He could almost hear the smirk, the inner gloating and the enticing beckon. All of this only made the fire inside Natsu burn stronger, deeper, more all-consuming. The fire mage heard the challenging cry that came from deep within.

Gray's smirk sharpened, almost as if he had heard it too and now he was close – only five or so steps away – so close that Natsu could smell the scent of his clothes, the crisp and clean scent of his skin, the cold from the inhospitable planes.

Oh, how he longed to soil that – to get at his throat to rip it off, freeing the irony tang of blood, taint it with dirt and mud, sully him until the stench surrounding Gray had become anything but enticing. If he could only stretch out his wings to soar, his claws to rip at what hindered him, be it a true attack or just these subterfuges that were only confusing him.

But, no. he had to calm and think, let rationality pierce the haze of confusion around him.

If only that were so simple…

Alas, his control was slipping – fast – and conscious thought was going out the window, like so many other times since this strange thing had started.

Strange, unknown feelings started overpowering him, making Natsu start to shake slightly.

He _wanted_.

With that, Natsu pounced.

* * *

_There was darkness._

_It filled everything, permeated the space at the same time that a suffocating feeling grew._

_Then, there was a faint red iridescence. A golden eye opened and stared ahead._

_There was nothing._

_And in the eventuality of something appearing, it would be consumed in a few moments. The stuffy feeling was overwhelming and caught everything in its tight grasp._

_The iridescence flared for some seconds before going down again._

_A growl filled the darkness._

* * *

Natsu evaded the fist coming towards his face easily only to have his own counteracted. Hands grappled and held, creating a minute balance that was broken in the next moment. A foot connected to the side of his leg and made Natsu start to go own. And go down he did – taking his opponent with him. The fire mage managed to kneel on top of the other, hands grasping tightly at his wrists, a feral smile stretching his lips. Of course that his smile got another in answer. This opponent would never show fear of him or feelings of such sort. No, he would never. Because he was his equal. And he would give as good as he got, just as fiercely.

Sometimes it even felt to Natsu that he held more power.

Gray.

The damned ice mage.

With his stupid magic, the blue creating a feeling of vastness that never failed to surprise Natsu.

The dragonslayer blocked another attack and managed to find a slight opening – of which he took opportunity. His elbow connecting with Gray's solar plexus had the ice mage taking a step back. The ice mage quickly regained his composure and seemed to decide to change tactics – Natsu saw the sharp smirk that was the only warning of how things were about to heat up. Well, more like cool down, to be accurate…

Natsu felt the temperature drop as Gray reached towards his ice core and _no!_ he had to stop it.

He would not allow Gray to-

* * *

_The world was on fire._

_Bright flames encompassed the world, eating away at everything with an ever-growing voracity. The fire grew, its noise increasing as it spread out._

_He rumbled, a sense of satisfaction spreading inside._

_Soaring above the flames he took in their growth, everything being consumed by his flames, their orangish and red glow illuminating his scales._

_The feeling of contentment continued to grow until-_

_No. the fire was diminishing, the light being snuffed out slowly, blue – terrible, immense places of cold blue – started to spread out and to control the fire, the edges already freezing._

_No!_

_This couldn't be!_

_However that was what was happening. The sense of accomplishment was gone now, replaced with a resentment that was getting to be too familiar by now. It controlled, it tamed._

_He didn't like that._

_'One would think you'd have learned something by now…' The words bounced teasingly in the vast planes._

Shut up! Shut up! SHUT UP!

* * *

Natsu came to with a gasp, sitting up and looking around in the dim lighting of the room. Because, yes, he was in one of the guild's bedrooms. And sitting in a bed. At its feet was Gray, sitting in a chair and his feet were propped on the bed. He had his arms crossed and was staring at the ceiling, seeming to be far, far away. Seconds ticked by before he looked at Natsu, arching an eyebrow. Natsu just glared and congratulated himself for the scrapes and bruises that he had landed on the prick.

"So, are you just going to sulk there for having lost or what?" Gray asked at the same time he got up and stretched.

Natsu snorted and let himself fall back on the bed.

"You wish. Besides, given the state of-" he paused to throw a pointed look at the ice mage, "well, _you_, I wouldn't say that. In reaction to his words he only got a dumbfounded look. Natsu chose to ignore it in favor of noting the aches and soreness he was feeling.

"You've got to be kidding!" Gray approached the bed and placed his right hand lightly on the fire mage's forehead, amusement curling at the edges of his annoyance.

Natsu let out a soft growl and scowled at Gray's actions – who did he think he was, mother-henning Natsu? – and grasped Gray's wrist and gave it a tug. Gray on the mattress and was rolled in such a way that Natsu was kneeling above him.

"No, no kidding here." Was Natsu's fierce answer.

"In that case I think you should think again because _that_ was a defeat, you moron. You can't deny it."

He made to push Natsu away but the fire mage grasped his wrists and pressed them against the mattress.

"Shut the fuck up! Despite whatever power you might hold over me, you're not my boss – or my owner." Natsu all but snarled.

Gray smirked and that was the last straw to Natsu. His hands curled around the ice mage's neck and made to start squeezing. And through all that Gray just lay in the bed, smirk firmly in place.

And then he lifted his left hand and placed it on the nape of Natsu's neck. Just resting it there, lightly. Some of the tension immediately left Natsu's shoulders.

At this the Salamander let out a growl and punched the mattress, scant centimeters from Gray's head. The ice mage didn't so much as flinch.

"This isn't about _owning_, Natsu. Don't you see?" Gray asked, both his tone and face neutral. Natsu was taken aback for a few instants, staring blankly at the ice mage.

"Don't fuck with me! Of course that-!" He started, only for his tirade to be cut by Gray.

"No, I don't." Gray stated firmly. "Open your eyes asshole. Open them and _see_. And try to make that pea you call brain work." Gray gave Natsu a shove and sat, glaring.

Natsu was glaring back from his undignified sprawl on the mattress' bottom edge.

"Don't you _dare_ calling me stupid." Natsu growled his words at Gray, he noticed when the other felt the spike in the temperature and saw the tiny flames that were starting to emerge from his hands and climbing up his forearms.

Gray hurried to grab Natsu's shoulders, the cold a balm against the blistering dryness.

"Stop that before you burn the bedding." Gray commanded, brows furrowing. "You know that you're going to have another earful if you burn more things."

Natsu slapped Gray's hands away and just sat, sullenly.

"I wasn't calling you stupid." Gray's statement was met with an eye roll and a muttered "of course not". "I'm _not_," he repeated and grasped the fire mage's left hand in both of his, earnestly trying to make Natsu see his point, it appeared. "Just…" he let out a frustrated sigh.

Natsu scowled. He didn't like this. Didn't like how Gray's words and touch were affecting him because, yes, the smooth coolness that was rising through his arm and spreading throughout his being brought a calm – peace – to him. Like water reaching the parched throat of a man lost in a desert.

"Then, why this? Why _us_?" A small tinge of resentment coloured the edges of the fire mage's words. "Why does it-!" he cut his train of thought abruptly. Gray looked at him and arched an eyebrow. "No. It might have happened once but I don't accept it." Natsu shook his head and nearly ripped his hand from Gray's grasp.

"Natsu, we've already been over this." Gray said, running a hand through his hair in aggravation. "It's not a matter of wanting or not. It just _is_."

"No!" Natsu nearly yelled, standing up from the bed and starting to pace around the room.

"I already said-" the dragonslayer paused and looked at Gray. "I don't like this or accept what you… how I… these… _feelings_!" he all but spat the word.

At this Gray just blinked. Once. Twice. And then his whole countenance just deflated and he looked tired.

Minutes went by with Natsu standing by the bed, his hands balled into fists and a mighty glare thrown Gray. The ice mage still sat cross-legged on the bed, his elbows resting on his knees. He appeared to be staring at his hands, the spiky strands of his hair obscuring his face.

After another stretch of apparently never ending time Gray straightened up and stood. He didn't look at Natsu when he spoke.

"If that's how you want it… but I can't do anything about this." He walked to the door and his hand rested on the door handle. "But know this," Gray threw a glance at Natsu, "I didn't ask for this either but it's not difficult to guess what's going to happen if you continue to be this bullheaded." Gray concluded sadly before stepping out the door and closing it with a soft _click_.

Natsu felt his back hit the wall and slid to the floor. His throat felt strange, as if he was choking on the air but that couldn't be right. And the feeling to which he always rebelled in Gray's presence was gone too, but in the stead of the feeling of victory he had envisioned a darkness that made him feel uncomfortable was lurking.

_What the fuck had he just done?_

* * *

Note: I wrote this story to my partner in crime, Subkulture. I'm so sorry that it didn't come up as I expected and it took so long to appear.

The title's after A Perfect Circle's song "Weak & Powerless". It's quite good and unfortunately I didn't manage to make the things I wanted come across. Oh well...

Feedback is always appreciated. ^^


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